PIB... Hi you don't know me at all....but I just finished reading your latest post and had lurked off and on way back when...you are really AMAZING. You have come so very far and seem so clear headed about yourself and future. Very impressive. You probably don't realize, with all your honesty, how many of us your encourage and help along the way. If you have a moment visit my post in piecing "being in neutral...." and I would welcome any advice as I am facing the "spearation."
Your overview of MLC was great help as well....I may re-read it to figure out just where my H is....maybe somewhere between depression/withdrawal....the anger has subsided now for a while. We even saw glimples of his ole self over the holidays.
I find that now that I'm putting my positives in a notebook to keep that I'm not posting as much.
Sorry bout that!
Perhaps it's a good thing...I think I need to detach from the bb a little bit.
So, get this. Last night, I didn't feel well...had a migraine along with nausea and sore throat.
So, I called Husband at work and left a message with Customer Service, telling her, "Have him call me." She asked if it was an emergency. I told her, "No, I just don't feel well."
So, he called me back and said he'd come home to take care of me.
I told him I was just going to go to bed early and sleep...no need for him to come home and take care of me.
He insisted that he wanted to take care of me.
Then when he got home, he woke me up.
He held me and snuggled with me. Asked me what I ate for dinner. I told him I cheated on my diet and got burger king. He chuckled.
We talked about various things. Then after talking for an hour, he told me that the girl (the one I didn't trust, but that he says is a good friend) wanted to hang out with him. But that he told her he was coming home to take care of me.
This is such a huge thing!
I told him I was going to bed early and was just going to sleep...that he didn't need to come home...and he did anyway!
This would have been the perfect oportunity for him to spend time with her, guilt free. We wouldn't be losing time together, as I was sleeping.
And yet, he still chose to ditch her and hang out with me, knowing I'd be sleeping!
Well, we ended up talking until 1 am, so, I didn't actually get any extra sleep last night.
But the reason we talked for so long was that he asked my opinion/advice about his job situation.
Now that he's been on vacation for a week, he's able to see how poorly he's treated, and realized that he's working hard, for long hours and getting no recognition for his hard work.
He's sooo ready to get a job in our town and quit working for CompUSA.
And he asked my opinion/advice.
The old husband, pre-separation, would have not shared any of it with me...much less asked for my input.
Who is this guy?
For Valentine's Day I gave him a card. The inside of the card said, "Am I dreaming you?"
He kept that card. I've been teaching him about Fly-Lady...and he's learned that he has no need to feel guilty for throwing cards away.
But he kept that card, he liked it so much. Said he wanted to keep it to look at.
Our success scares me sometimes. It's amazing how the little things I do result in the huge dramatic happiness that we get.
I don't know why he loves me so much. But I'm grateful that he does.
Well, whoever he is ... he sounds like a keeper !!!
... and that is sooo cool about your MIL!
I know its only February, but I would like to nominate PnB for DBer of the year! ...
Not only have you DB'd your M successfully, but also ...
your parents ...
and now your MIL.
You ROCK!!
... and on top of that, PnB, I came by today to once again thank you for your mention of the herbal pillow. CAW had a major panic attack last night (then it dawned on her she forgot to take her meds in the AM). Within seconds!! of placing the heated pillow on her chest, it started to subside and in a minute's time, she was able to calm down. Nothing else has worked sooo fast before!
Hope you stay in touch around here too ... you have enriched so many of our lives!
Some people will continue to love you, no matter what you do. Others will refuse to think well of you, regardless of how many heroic or even saintly moves you make. There is then, little point in striving too hard to satisfy either of these audiences. At the risk of comparing you to a politician, in search of the floating vote, I must point out that you are currently looking for a particular form of support. Go where you obviously stand the best chance of getting it. If that doesn't work, go where it may just be possible. But don't waste time on hopeless causes.
Hope you and Monkey are doing well. 
. Within seconds!! of placing the heated pillow on her chest, it started to subside and in a minute's time, she was able to calm down. Nothing else has worked sooo fast before!