DIG DEEP DIG ON

[Ambivalent]

Thank you BF.

Yesterday was so stressful . In the middle of trying to complete the project, both computers decided to act up. One would not connect to the internet, and the other 's keypad was wigging out. So I had to drive to my daughter's who is a half hour away, have her enter the project on her laptop, then transfer it to a stick.

Driving to school in the middle of rush in this area is a NIGHTMARE!
After that I was an hour and a half late to school. The person there was supposed to print out my project and she had me wait another 50 minutes! Needless to say I was calling everyone to let them know prior to, and during. My class was itching to leave school. Nobody had a clue what my week has been like, and to be honest they're young and could care less.

I slept 'til my usual four a.m. and then tried for the last hours.

Brother in law got the email and responded with other than the game, what can I bring? HE is stepping up and will be here!

I don't know if H. made a point to tell him to go or not. Most likely he did. I don't care, all I know is it will be nice for our daughter's and it will have a bit of a family feel.

My youngest daughter is taking note that H. has decided to think only of himself. He also just told her that the fee to get her towed car back was her Christmas gift.
I'm glad I warned her of the upcoming money behavior, so she too will be prepared.

She told me last night that because of my H's income, and nobody to co-sign, getting a loan is not possible. She is a dependent on his taxes. I told her the sooner she was independent the better. She can then be assessed on her lack of income, and wonderful character references . She needs to develop credit and fast. She has already looked into taking a second part time position.
This is from the one who is in school full time, a Chem. major and working on two minors as well. She is working part time and she was the treasurer for her sorority. She was responsible for thousands of dollars. THAT was an awesome responsibility and should have her in good steed.

She wants to stay where she is , and I told her that was her choice and I support her. If she gets the lab job in the Western part of the juxtaposed state, I'll see her quite a bit. She may rethink things by then, gas would be unbelievable.

She will come out Sun. night and D. #1 will follow probably the Christmas Eve. She is always a trial and I will get to DB practice with her.

God has seen fit to challenge me with all that is going on. I often ask Him , why?

I looked into legal aide this morn, and filled out the app. Not a very good process, for it doesn't give one the choices needed and I have to be concerned with pro-bono work. I will have to do more research.

I'm going to try to get to the storage facility to dig for tax records, and other docs. If I don't there is tomorrow. But believe I should do it today.

I am going to force myself to go to the dance tonight. It is hard , for I feel like a wounded bird at times. I don't want to give off the aura of a needy person.

I don't know how those who go through this ever reconcile.

I am not looking forward to giving the evidence of the V. , receipts, etc. I feel it is blindsiding him. I don't think he was preparing to hurt me, and this will bring out a different person. Or maybe he may feel even more guilt, if I am lucky enough.

What I'm uncomfortable with are the e-mail exchanges. His attorney WILL tell him not to do it any longer. IF they are good. Then there goes any communication.

Do people actually get this far and further and then stop?

Job, at one point with the first BD, husband said " I could have everything" over the Summer he wanted to keep him in the loop about the snow blower and lawn mower.

If I sell the sno-blower before Christmas, I have a great chance. Now he did sell our Tiger mower to pay for the maintenance of the yard before he left. And didn't consult me, so am I okay with selling the sno-blower?

Or anything else for that matter?