Hoping to still move forward, huge setback

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Most of the time we end up having sex is because I will say, " you in the mood for sex"
She responds, "not really, but fine if that's what you want"

Please don't do this! This, at least for me, is a turnoff all on it's own. Women are not like men, as Dr. Phil says "Women need a reason, men need a place". I would much rather my husband rub my back, hold me, kiss me, hug me, etc.. so there is a feeling of some closeness before sex. Don't get me wrong, I am all for a quickie sometimes and don't need elaborate gestures, however, I don't want that all of the time. I hated when my H would say something like that, I finally told him how much it turned me off and he stopped.
I know he was doing it because it felt like less of a rejection to him if I said no to that than to his actual physical advances but I am much more open to the physical advances then "Are you in the mood?".

PT may not be your Ws primary LL but most of us like it (I can't remember if there was abuse in her childhood? If so, she may not like it. Otherwise, I think most people like it to some extent). So get in bed, hold your wife, gently rub her arm, back, etc. Do it without any expectation of sex. Sometimes, do it just to do it and other times you can try to take it further.