Accepting the Confusion - It is what it is Part 5

[BrightFuture]

Angela, you just described my struggle with the changes I’ve been making. I used to be kind, non-judgmental person before. Then I felt like people were walking all over me, so I changed. I always was sarcastic, but I started to use my sarcasm in a very hurtful way, and a lot of it with my H. I know that when I was sarcastic it was because I was hurting and was trying to get back to him. Then I didn’t feel good after that, I felt like I diminished myself in his and my own eyes. I’m very aware of it now. I’m learning to be kind and non-judgmental again, but draw a line to not be a doormat. This is very challenging, since I need to learn how to say no. T2 is right about the line to be razor thin.

I stopped crying a few months ago and I thought I was doing good. Then it all came back and I cry almost every day now. I think I’m just tired of this limbo, and I still cannot force myself to move it along.

Pud is right, you might be getting better at detaching. As long as you feel good about your changes this is all that matters.