Wife wants Divorce, I do Not

[NotAgainPlease]

BH,
I feel your pain and your uncontrollable panic in your posts. I am by no means a good DBer but probably a good poster child for not
Like me you will probably feel like you are starting over everyday. Just keep pushing through. Scream in a pillow and get it out. Another thing I do when I want to say something too H I will type out an email and not send it. IT feels like you sent it, then a few hours later you feel good that you didn't.
Another thing to do is just get out there live your life and occupy your time. Hard when all you want to deal is hide under the covers.

[MrBond]

Of course she won't talk to you. You told her that you moved on in your last email to her. You said it was to make you feel better.

[NotAgainPlease]

Trying to push or make jealous doesn't work. THEY DON'T CARE!
Best not to say anything. Just be quiet.

[burning heart]

I don't know what I'm doing

[MrBond]

Step back and take a deep breath. You had a backslide. Nothing more. You can recover from this. Have you finished reading DR? Concentrate on things OTHER THAN your W.

[burning heart]

I feel lost and out of control.

My MIL sent a message two days ago saying W will not talk to anyone about anything. She will still file as soon as she can. She is afraid of being hurt and sad.

[Cadet]

She is afraid of being hurt and sad.

Too late she is probably already hurt and sad.

The best thing you can do is accept that.
Stop trying to FIX her.
Let her go instead.

Go as DARK as possible and that is the only chance you have of slowing down the divorce.

[burning heart]

I'm having a hard time letting go and accepting it's over.
I can't seem to let go of hope.
Real hope or hope I want or think is still there.
I really don't think that this is all there is for us. Forever. Period.
Right now it is. And I need to accept that.

I'm going to look up divorce forms and laws tomorrow.
And what I need to do. I found an attorney that I can get a better idea from too.
So I have to get things setup and rolling.

[FlyOnTheWall]

So you go from writing a letter talking about how she doesn't want to work on things, so you realize its over and your moving on. Even thou you need to grow and change.

To I cant seem to let go of hope.

To going to look up divorce forms?

Your trying so hard to get her to see YOUR pain, understand what YOUR going thru. Why do you need to get things set up and rolling? Cause you need to be in control? If this is going to happen your darn well sure its gonna happen your way!!

Your barely even a cup of coffee into this, PLEASE SLOW DOWN.

Your right, your out of control.

Maybe you need to work on that for a while before you start making anything else a priority. You seem to act on emotions, good or bad. how's that working out for ya? Been there, done that, I promise your heading down the wrong road.

[burning heart]

Now what? It's not a control issue. She's having an affair. Doesn't seem to care about anything but that. I'm not trying to get her to see my pain.

People on this forum and elsewhere have suggested filing.

Wait for the affair to play out?
Worry she may rack up debt because she's "super broke"?