MLC and the holidays....tra la, la, la, la, la

[AJM]

I for one, am interested in hearing that second post and how things go, Wonka. I do sincerely wish you the best in this part of your journey.

I think you're on the right path. I'm glad to see you there because I think you'll find it highly important and freeing. We're wired, as humans, for social interaction. We're also wired for reconciliation - not always the outcome we initial desire, but we do need to be reconciled with others in some way.

For many of us, we have to reconcile on our own. It is a truly a gift to reconcile with the other person involved. (I've seen this many times. Sometimes 20 or 30 years later. At that point, many didn't realize they still needed it until presented with it.)

AJ: I do think it would bring BOTH of us peace and lighten our burdens by getting some thoughts out in the open. Not sure how this will play out. Someone has to make the first move, right? I do see what you mean by 'reconciliation' of sorts by talking openly with each other. How open is the big question here. Perhaps there will be certain limits on that because who wants to dredge up painful memories and feelings associated with this.

I suggest that you should be resolute in this. It is likely she'll want this but not trust it - at least at first. I don't think I would if in her shoes. I would also wish she had bigger feet but that's separate.

There is healing in dredging up painful memories. But there's also a lot of hard work. And as you mentioned, somebody has to go first as well as lead the way.

I doubt it will go easily, but I do not doubt it will be worth it and that you'll do it. Reconciliation is important, even if you both have to go down different paths. It's a gift that only you can initiate. Without hiding, giving up, or expectations.

Looking forward to the thoughts, Wonka.

AJ

(BTW, as a Christian, your comment above about "poof - you're forgiven for all" rings a few bells. It's a great reminder what Christmas is all about. Just sayin )