Moved Back from Overseas to Figure This Out...

[S4tk]

I read some of that book, mostly the opening the cage chapter.

Would you use his verbiage or come up with your own?

What do you mean by leaving with the kids? Without her knowledge?

What does having her leave without them mean?

And in the final analysis, you have to decide if you're done.

Labug, thank you for sticking with me here. When you respond, it helps me to see that I am not being clear. Being aware of my lack of clarity helps me to realize and accept that I have a lot of work to do in improving my communication.

I am not done. If what I wrote above indicates that, then I was not clear. i know I tend to analyze things quite a bit, and chew on both sides of a decision. That definitely comes out in my journaling and my advice requests here. So I understand that confusion.

The truth is, I do not feel like I am in control over the decision of my "doneness". I am not done. But I will use an illustration: two Olympic pair figure skaters. If one of them decides to retire, the decision is made for the other. The unretired skater then chooses either to retire, find a new partner, or continue solo.

Back to the M. I am not done, but I am becoming more OK if her "doneness" is permanent.

Precipitating a crisis, or forcing a blowout, would be an attempt to foster an environment where we both have a chance to evaluate things more effectively. But it is risky.