I know our spouses are confused and in a fog with these sitch's, but cc's wife seems very interested in him. Even jealous at times.
What is keeping her from ditching her OM and moving forward to save her marriage? It just seems like a no brainer from this perspective! How long does this carry on for?
Makes me feel hopeless since my H is nowhere near showing that kind of interest towards me.
Bluesgal,
She may very well have interest in me. She tells me all the time how much better I look. last night she said.. wow " you are looking buff". I feel like she is very much still 'attracted' to me.
Obviously working out, eating right, and having more confidence is paying off in that respect.
You mention jealousy. I have noticed this too. Every time I pull away and do something out of the ordinary she becomes jealous. I found out that she has searched my facebook. (OM told her that I was actively pursuing Other women on facebook? I liked one photo of a girl who had lost a lot of weight, and she confronted me about it)
OM has also instilled in her mind that I'm being manipulative. That my actions are trying to control every aspect of the situation, like this is a chess game. She believes that i'm trying to turn everyone against her (she confronted me on this).
The answer i gave her is this. My goal is to have you as a wife, and continue our marriage. Turning people against you does not further that goal. I am sorry that is the way you feel.
However, This does not mean that she thinks I can make her happy. From what she has told me, OM makes her happy. She is happy when she is with him, and was not happy with me for a long time.
She does not believe that we have any common interests, and has told me that "she doesn't deserve me".
Words are words are words.
Who knows what she means by any of this, I don't pretend to. All I know is what I can see. And what I see is that she continues to talk and see the OM. By these actions she shows that she does not currently want to move forward in our marriage.
I have set my boundary, that we cannot be together while she is with OM. I am sticking to this.
With this boundary, can I be playful, yet out of reach?
