My h and I went through the same thing (at about the same point after BD) with lots of nasty emails, yelling when he was here, name calling - the whole kit and caboodle. In between, things would seem to calm down, but we'd invariably end up fighting again.
I finally realized that I was becoming the exact person I did not want to be. And I realized that trying to ease my pain by dishing out pain to him was hurting me as much as him - probably more, because I am not that type of person. And I realized that there was no way he would ever want to come back to that person.
I made a decision to "stop the train." I promised myself that I would not instigate anymore nastiness and I would bite my tongue if he tried to start something. It wasn't always easy - I just took it on one day at a time.
My life is much calmer now. He is calmer now. The sitch may not have changed much, but we are at least civil to one another and he has obviously picked up on my lead. There are small signs of improvement.
Please, Tiger, try to remember that you want to be the one he wants to come home to. And remember to ask yourself if what you are about to say will help you in your goal to save the R or make it more difficult.
I understand that there are a lot of issues (like the groceries, the car, etc.) that the two of you need to address, but you really need to find a way to address those things in a manner that shows you in a good way - a way that will make him ask himself, "Uh ... do I really want to leave this awesome person for zipperface?"
Dig down deep and find that woman who is strong, patient and amazing! Do it for your s and do it for yourself!
Me: 59 and holding H: :53 Me: 1 S, 1 D, both grown M: 19 T: 23 BD: 9-23-2013
