Your missing the point, she doesn't WANT to work/talk/save the marriage, she's done.
DR isn't about saving your marriage, its about saving yourself, if it saves the marriage, that's just a bonus. Its about giving you the tools to understand why you got there in the first place.
The problem is, in her mind she spent quite a bit of time giving you hints or telling you your marriage was in trouble, you didn't respond.
Now that you are putting in the work, your upset she doesn't see the effort. See the paradox? Your now angry at lack of effort, but fail to realize she went thru that stage already and is passed all of those steps. Everything you think your doing is just an attempt to get her back. she knows that, she knows you better than you think she does.
Why would she want to go back to the same old habits, cause you say your changing? you haven't been at it long enough to change for real, but I understand this feels real to you now. I'm not saying your not making changes, but right now we tend to change cause we think we're in a dire situation, and this is going to fix things, we understand we're losing our spouse.
Give it all more time, your trying too hard to make it happen now. This isn't going to happen on YOUR timeline.
