Look what the cat dragged in! (TL) - Act 2

[tigerlily78]

Well, after the nap he invited me upstairs. I should have said no, but didn't. We had a nice time, but I accidentally left a mark on him. I guess the lack of self control is contagious.

We took son to get a tree this afternoon. Argued in the car because I thought he was driving extra recklessly and didn't manage to express it nicely enough.

I am a total B*tch. Have *always* been a b*tch. Funny with all my b*tchy history he has to keep bringing up the same 3 or 4 things from the past all the time and then immediate things that really aren't so b*tchy... Like reminding him I don't think it is appropriate or respectful for him to leave evidence of his other relationship in the car (travel coffee cup with lipstick stains today, ugh).

You are probably right that I need to STFU. But in a way I can also see how the mask is cracking. He can certainly try and pretend that life is still awesome and fun, but it isn't. I guess I do need to be careful of giving him ammunition, because he WILL use it to blame me.

I was reading up some more on the end of replay and avoid/escape on a few different sites. So yes, I guess I need to tread more carefully now. The path and the doubts are sown. I need to be more patient.

PATIENCE. PATIENCE. PATIENCE.

I have been sleeping so crappy, I think that is part of my problem. I get easily fed up and crabby when I am not rested. That bottle of wine may evaporate this week so I can test if it helps me sleep better.