SM34's Post

[SM34]

I agree, I haven't dropped the rope. Its so hard! I'm not quite as emotionally tied as I might seem, but I'm definitely on the rollercoaster. The in depth descriptions were for MrBond because he asked how the interactions where and so I wanted to capture the moments.

I've slept on the Accuray post now, and I do see I need to drop the rope. I need to start doing more things for myself and by myself so I can reach that point..ASAP.

Today her first big paycheck is supposed to hit our account. She has said all along that she wanted to use it on mortgage and bills so she can 'help me for once'.

Not sure who recalls but part of my sitch involved a lot of prrssure from her regarding our financial situation. She never viewed her getting a job as an option, only me working harder and smarter. And the stress become too much for my weak little OLD self. I caved and buckled under the pressure and withdrew.

So now she wants to help. Anyway, this morning she said she wants some of thr money to buy xmas gifts for herself to unwrap since I wouldn't be getting her any. I never said that by the way, I know xmas is a big deal to her and I always get her something.

So when I asked her what she had in mind she handed me the ipad with amazon open with her wish list. I looked through and noticed a button for 'other lists' and there was a list with OMs name with 19 gifts. I'm sure she's not getting all of them but those were what's she's picked.

Anyway, so I set the ipad down and said I'd take a look at her list tonight. A lot of it was stuff for the house, like new pots, a statue, etc.

So here is something BIG that I want to do that is totaly and completely out of character. I'm from a culture where we don't believe in separate finances and she knows and has relied on that. So what i want to do subtract half the mortgage from her work deposit and withdraw the rest in cash and give it to her.

Then I can explain that she paid half the mortgage since we are roommates. The rest is yours to do what you want with.

She needed to be making her own money a long time ago do she can feel good about herself. I realized that too late, so now she should have her own money. Whebn I've mentioned its her money to do what she wants with, she has said sarcastically 'well no, its not'. So here it is babe. You are free! Fly like a bird!

What do you guys think? Its a step towards separating finances right? A litle bit of reality.