Last night we went to my D christmas play for her pre-school. I was friendly and cordial, but kept my distance emotionally. My W kept trying to act as if we were best friends. (as i don't want to be friends, i ignored most of her "freindly" gestures... high five??? seriously?)
Anyways, other than that things were fine. We got home and W wanted to take D over to her girl friends house to play with her son. While she was getting ready we had a small moment. We both tried to walk through the door (opposite ways) at the same time. Their was a lot of sexual tension. I gave her the devilish grin and said "kiss me". She kept smiling at me, and told me she couldn't, she said "she doesn't deserve me".
I didn't let it phase me, I kept right on smiling. I said Ok and walked away like she was missing out on the most important thing in the world. Before she left she brought up some R talk. She said she coulnd't figure out what was going on. She thought that I hated her, yet here I am acting like nothing is wrong. "why do you want me now???, why can't you take your eyes off of me".
She seemed totaly confused. I felt in control (not of the situation, but of myself) I'm not pretending to know what she was thinking, nor do I really care. But I definitely sensed confusion and at least from my perspective she slipped down a rung on the power ladder.
I couldn't help myself... Before she left I said, "try not to think of me tonight" I smiled devilishly once again.
She looked like a lost puppy.
It didn't even sting when she left. I felt confident, cool, and collected.
