Oh bright I am sorry you are feeling confused and fed up. It's such a familiar feeling. I'm tired. I'm tired of being an irritation to H ( that's how it feels- like someone he has to put up with because I birthed his children). More lately I feel on the verge of tears.. Maybe the holidays really do affect us all.

I know you are apprehensive about H. But you can so this. I like heather's advice- stick to the script, post, and have a drink or more. You are emotionally stewed and you need to find a way to let go of some of the anxiety. I am sorry about the job prospect BF. I believe there is something better out there for you.

Jack once termed my frustrations with the 'nothingness' of the sitch as the doldrums of DBing. That helped and still helps me when I feel an anXious for movement and answers.

Keep focusing on you BF. We are here for you.

TPS
Me: 44 H: 42
M14 T17
S10 D7
10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month
21/04/12 H is 'DONE'
04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010)
July '14 H ends affair
May '15 H moves back home