Rise & Shine II

[melissag]

Blues - It made me feel a lot better whe. I realized that the things my H was sayong was part of the script. You just went through BD and you are already doing better than i did for montha after. Once I learned to forgive myself for the backslides and for the moments of anger and sadness, things got a lot easier. I stopped being so critical of myself. GAL really does help. I am an introvert so I hate new situations. But once I put myself out there is got easier.

Tonight I headed out to happy hour with a group if women who are all recently separated or divorced. It was great to get out. When I got home, one of the Christmas presents I had ordered arrived. Each year I would get a new family Christmas ornament for our tree. I was agonizing over what to do this year. I finally found the most beautiful ornament and it arrived today. I love it. It is a wooden snowflake with the word "BELIEVE" inscribed on the front. After BD I bought myself a heart necklace with the word believe handstamped inside. Anytime that I was feeling sad, I would wear the necklace to remind myself that I need to believe in myself, to believe in god and to just let go. If I felt the urge to call H or do something stupid, the necklace served as a reminder to stop myself and to really start believing in me. It is the word that I repeat to myself if I feel that pain and grief start to take over. I am so excited that I will have this ornament to hang each year to remind me of how I learned to love and believe in myself again.

3, how did you find such a group of women? I would LOVE to even talk to someone IRL who is going through the same. All of my friends are married and even though the two I have told are amazing and I don't know where I would be without them, it would just be so great to have someone to go out with, or chat with, or commiserate with, or anything!

I am so excited that I will have this ornament to hang each year to remind me of how I learned to love and believe in myself again.

Wow, this brought tears to my eyes. 3, you always inspire me! I know that this has not been an easy path for you, but you are amazing. Really. And you have once again inspired me - this time to come up with my own version of your one word! Thank you for this.