1) The loss is real - There is something very tragic about the loss of a deep and meaningful long term relationship. The damage to kids, finances, your self esteem, is significant. You have to grieve the death of your dreams and you can clearly see the potential in the relationship that your spouse can't. Working through this grief takes time.
2) The relationship was very intimate - My spouse was my best friend. It was the longest, deepest and most intimate relationship I have ever had. The truth is that nobody knows you as well as your spouse. The rest of the world just sees a superficial facade. Rejection from this person is incredibly hurtful and hard to get over.
We hold unto hope, because we realize the loss and we want to avoid it. We want to be validated. we long to hear "I was wrong, you really are a terrific person, I accept you again"
These are very normal feelings and if you didn't feel them then there would be something wrong with you. don't feel bad because you seem emotionally stuck and are having a hard time detaching. Detachment takes time, there is no "Easy" button.
I've never run a marathon, but I've heard there is a "wall" you hit where you just want to stop. It's too much. But, I've also heard people talk about the euphoria you feel after it's done. I suspect we will reach that point if we keep going. Keep going Bright. You're not alone.
Hope that facial is awesome!!
"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man
“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson
