Sinking into a dark place

[PatientMan]

I believe it takes all kinds of tools (forum, counselor, friends, prayer, books, etc.) to improve your life in any area...not just marriage.

In your OP you asked:

"What am I doing wrong?"

Here are some action items:

• Lose the weight and get into great shape. Quit complaining about it and just do it. You will be more attractive and healthier. You will be a better version of you, and this will help with your self-confidence.
• Start getting your back waxed.
• Stop jumping through your wife's endless hoops - they're just distractions that exhibit your beta-male behavior. You need more alpha-male behavior to attract her.
• Give your W some space. This will allow her time to think, it will allow YOU some independence, and it may draw her in according to the distance/pursuit dynamic.
• Read those books!

It does take all kinds of tools...that is correct! But the wrong tool at the wrong time can make things worse for you.

You said you came here for advice and support. You're getting exactly that from people who have been through what you've been through. You don't seem to like the advice and support, though, so you seem to be dismissing it.

You're certainly entitled to do whatever it is you want, but ignoring the advice of people who have already been through your experience doesn't seem very wise.

-PM