Sinking into a dark place

[MrBond]

"I disagree about the counselor."

You may disagree, but I've been here over 5 years and I don't think I've seen a case where a C actually helped unless the WAS is the one who actually goes on there own initiative without the LBS.

"I took the initiative ..."

Still controlling. Let her go and seek help if she wants to but let her be the one to initiate. If she doesn't, then you know she wasn't serious.

"This is a combined relationship that will take BOTH of us changing things in order to improve."

Start reading DB and DR ASAP. You are very wrong about this. It will take ONE of you to change to make things improve.