Heather, No 2X4's today. Like a junkie, you need to hit bottom and figure things out.
The only thing I have to say is that if you want to wallow, by all means wallow. No one can make you happy or better...but yourself. You are addicted to your h and his communications. You haven't had your "high" today and you are hurting and needing it, i.e., just like a junkie needs his/her fix. You need to be going to some Alanon meetings so that you can better understand why you feel so low, especially when there isn't any activity from your mlc h. You definitely need support in breaking your addiction of your h and this is something that we can talk about until the cows come home, but until you make up your mind that you don't need these fixes to make you happy/better, the only thing we can do is listen and continue to say the same things over and over again.
On another note, I about died laughing last night. Ever watch NCIS? Well, the one guy from one of the agencies, either FBI or CIA, called another actor a walking mid-life crisis. The words MLC are starting to pop up in a lot of shows these days.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
