In mid May I received a call that every parent fears.. that my oldest son was in an accident four hours away and in ICU. He should have been killed when he was ejected from a taxi cab which was T-boned by a vehicle going at least 40 mph which caused the taxi to do a 360. He suffered multiple skull fractures, a broken shoulder and stitches where his forehead was split and the corner of his eyelid torn. Every medical professional agrees that he should have died. He was lucky, very, very lucky to have been injured right next to a leading trauma center where he received superlative care. Now seven months later he is fully recovered and waiting for the final paperwork to go back to work. His goal was to recover 120 percent. He's amazing.
Initially in the ICU only his father and I were allowed in the room. While sitting together I realized I didn't know this man and could think of nothing to say to him. He talked about work and I nodded. We were both committed to our son's well being. He stayed until our son was off the critical list.
During my son's recovery I had the unique experience of having all my adult and young adult children living with me. It was an opportunity to bond on a completely different level. It was a gift for me and all three kids. By the end of August/early September, they were all gone; my daughter to college, another son to a different city for his job, and the recovering son back to his house to live independently.
I learned a lot and feel very lucky, very blessed. I'm in the Christmas show at the community theatre and am loving my involvement. It's a wonderful production with a group of people (young and old alike) who are like family.
It's taken a few years to feel single again. I still haven't jumped into the dating pool but have started working on cementing and creating new friendships. My son's accident taught me to let go of lots of things and cherish what is real.
You have so much to be thankful for this Christmas. Your son's survival and recovery are a true miracle. I am so happy for you.
I can relate to the ex in The ICU as that happened to me 2 years ago when Ryan (oldest son) was on life support for a couple of weeks & not expected to live. I sat there with ex - a man I barely recognized and tried to find something to talk about. My siblings felt the same way. What do you talk about? Having him meet Josh was even weirder but we all did our best just as I'm sure you did.
Kudos to you for getting involved in your theater - pursuing something you enjoy. I wish I was close enough to see it.
I'm sorry to hear your son was in such serious condition and hope he's doing well.
I took it as a good sign that there was nothing to talk about with the ex. That meant all the angst and uck had dissipated along with the connection. We were able to talk as parents though.
This is a weird time of year. I find I'm having little flashbacks of being together the last Christmas. Looking back at it, I think this was when he started to sever ties while the marriage was still intact. However, I was suffering from a severe head injury and was pretty clueless and didn't pick up on it until later!
Acting and being involved with the theatre is wonderful for me. Here's a teaser clip of the show. I can't be seen in anything! The songs the adults are in weren't included!
Thank you! Anna is 19 and a sophomore in college. I had a temp job that lasted several months. There was a lull and I went to help my mom after she'd had surgery. Then I had the opportunity to go to Hawaii with free accommodations with my college roommate. The day after I got back, I got the call that my son had been in the accident. I found Hawaii to be very spiritual and when times were tough I'd think of the rainbows as gifts of the spirit. It was very helpful during those terrifying days.
I'm going to gear up for January to enter the work force.
The show is a Christmas variety show of different Christmas songs.. some common, some unique. One was written by a young man who has two shows in pre production for Broadway. It's not in the video clip I posted to Barb but goodness, I cry through it. It's so touching.
How goes your life? I hope your holidays are full of warmth and family (the good type!).
Who would have thought even a couple of years ago that I could say I am doing pretty good? The kids as they have gotten older have kept me hopping. In some ways that is good but in others I find myself plain worn out.
I am looking for a part time job to help me get ahead since alimony will end this summer. I am checking out flex jobs. I am hoping to find a job that lets me work when I want and not particular hours. You might check it out as they have freelancing, telecommuting jobs as well as part time jobs.
Taking some vacation days around Christmas. So ready for that little break.
Kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
My life is going pretty well. Josh & I are taking my daughter Ashley to Hawaii in January. We are so excited. She is over the moon. She has had some recent medical issues (terrible pain) & lost her job as a result. Hard for a young person but we have focused on getting her well & she is helping me with her handicapped brother now that she is feeling better.
I'm having some health issues too. Diabetes diagnosis this week and I am going for tests for other health issues. I hope things turn out ok.
Other than that - I'm happy in my new life, new town, new friends etc. happy to have 2 out of 3 kids nearby.
Revel in the chaos your kids bring you. There's plenty of time to rest when it's done. The days are long but the years are short when it comes to raising kids.
I'll check out Flex Jobs.. I've never heard of it!
How exciting! HAWAII!!! What a beautiful gift to share with your daughter!
The diabetes diagnosis had to be scary. I was diagnosed 2 years ago and am now managing it through diet and exercise. I'm sending prayers, hugs and love your way and hope everything turns out okay.
Congratulations on all the wonderful 'news' you have in your life. You're an inspiration!
Yes, I know Gypsy it all goes too fast. Flexjobs.com does charge a fee but I think the annual fee was like 32.00. You can also go monthly. I figured, I could find a couple of short term jobs or happen to find a longer term job that is just telecommuting.
Whatever works! Just got home from d13's orchestra concert. Nice to actually be able to grab a quick bite and then get ice cream with the family. Nice to be able to get along enough with ex to pull it off.
I am actually happy about that, especially after my friend being divorced for 10 years still having issues. My kids deserve better. I know it doesn't always work but I've really tried.
Kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
