During the day as I got ready to go, I decided that I would not contact BF since our plan was somewhat in place. He texted me to double check the plans and called me sweetie, cutie and another lovey nickname...:) The latter was something that he has not called me for awhile...even before we split up. So that was nice. I have to say, my mentality has changed so much. I was not nervous to see him like I have been. I was not counting down the minutes, nor did I make a big deal in my mind about how it was all going to play out. I was very successful at having zero expectations. When he got home we changed for the party and I have to say, I nailed the looking hot thing! It was a 180 in a way because I never have a reason to get that dressed up! BF definitely noticed and complimented me a lot. The party was nice...we were late but it was good to show face and to have BF there because I am so new with the company I didn't know a lot of people. I talked with my big boss and bonded with his wife so that was good. It was good for BF to see what opportunities this new job has for me, and the boss's wife said the perfect thing to him. She was talking about her husband and how if it weren't for her, he would be 3 sheets to the wind. Then she looks at BF and says, "I look after him and you know what they say...behind every good man is an amazing woman! Remember that!" She even made him repeat it to her!! She has no idea how perfect that was!
During the evening we had good talks, took fun pictures, and he thanked me a lot for inviting him. He made many other positive comments as well.
I have a new inner peace. I can feel my confidence returning because I know I will be ok no matter what happens with BF. I have come a loooong way and still have further to go, but I have overcome a setback. I know now it had to happen so that I got rid of expectation and anticipating his actions/reactions.
I am going to move forward and let him come to me. He mentioned he was probably working for the remainder of the holidays...maybe his way of letting me know he was unavailable. Not thinking about it too much and I am just making my own plans for everything. The way I see it, he will be lucky to spend time with me, whenever it is!
Me:35 BF:36 Together 4.5 years lived together 2 years moved out 8-13 still "together" but not together. Confused. D11, D13 (from 1st marriage)
