You've gotten some great advice here. When I read your first post my initial thoughts were similar to Melissa's. Men tend to see "great sex" as the physical act of sex- doing this position and that position and having this many climaxes, etc. But women don't respond as much to the physical act as they do the emotional connection. They need the emotional connection first, THEN the physical part becomes enjoyable. It sounds to me like you are strictly focusing on the physical part and the emotional connection is not there. As long as the emotional connection isn't there, your W is never going to enjoy the physical part. I think that may be why her attitude is just to get it over with.
Originally Posted By: Aaron Taylor
I know I'm disgusting and she tells me: "you were big when I married you, it doesn't bother me"
It sounds like you've got pretty low self-esteem. I seriously doubt you're "disgusting", the vast majority of the population (at least here in America) is very overweight. There's a big difference between being overweight and being a disgusting slob. An overweight person that dresses and grooms nicely and carries themselves with confidence can be just as attractive as anyone else. When some here mentioned that you should lose weight and get a makeover, it's as much for you as it is for your W. You need to do things to make you feel better about you, to build up your self-esteem and confidence. That will in turn make you more attractive.
Quote:
I honestly believe that she's disgusted by me and it's hard for her to even come near me because of it.
I think you're disgusted with yourself and that in turn is making you less attractive to her. So get busy doing things to make YOU love YOU again :)Don't look at losing 70 pounds as your goal, make your goal to lose 5. Then when you get there, celebrate! Then set a new goal to lose another 5. For each little bit you lose you will look and feel better and your self-esteem will grow.
