In the beginning of our marriage we did, but now we live w/o debt (except our home) and I've done my best (sometimes working 3 jobs) to help her fulfill her calling to stay home with the kids.
She hasn't worked outside the home for over 18 years. I love that! It's a dream we share.
Trust funds, retirement are lacking so I may start to focus on those things.
Like I said earlier....to help her feel at ease with our finances, she doesn't have anything to do with them. I pay everything... took her on a 2 week vacation to a tropical island....sending her overseas in a couple months with my son....bought her a new car (used I paid for in cash) bought her a jawbone (for all you exercise lovers) etc...
Not making excuses, but financially, we are in the best place we've ever been in our history together.
I hope people understand that I'm not asking for the "act of sex" every day. I'm just asking for affection primarily. Her to greet me when I come home with a kiss...a hug... hold my hand....tell me you miss me and you thought about me. It's almost non-existent.
I know this sounds prideful and arrogant but I honestly don't mean for it to be. Honestly, I have been the one to openly be willing to change everything she's asked me to change in the last 10 years.
From taking care of my teeth(which I didn't realize was infected) so I can understand how disturbing that was for a season. But I'm good now and have been for several years.
Since I have unsightly hair on my back, I believe that she finally got up the nerve to tell me it grosses her out and asked me to wear a t-shirt to bed from now on (this was 8 years ago or so).
To work out with me, plant flowers with me, be at home more, I actually love shopping (i know I'm weird) so we do that together, tried date nights more frequently.... NOTHING!
Again...she says: "Deal with it, it's the way I am and I can't help it."
So, we continue to go from argument to argument over a few months and end up in the same spot.
I know I'm not attractive, but I really try with what I have. I shower every day. Shave, can "fix" my hair because I'm bald, I have a belly which isn't pleasant, I'm overweight but not in an obese sickly way.
Since she started going to the gym, I believe she's seen men who look nothing like me and I just gross her out.
It's just depressing. I'm going to just focus on being a dad and find other joys in life that hopefully satisfy that desire.
