Melissa thank you for your inspiring comment. Yes you are right that something better might be out there for all or us. But what about our kids? What about my daughter?
I think the same thing, but what can you do? My kids will, in all likelihood (if we get D), grow up with Daddy issues. H is a great Dad (if that can be said about someone who leaves his family) and still sees them, but they are smart enough to know, even now, without being told, that H is the one made this decision. Right now they are OK because they think he is coming back when his lease ends in May (he is well aware of this and doesn't disabuse them of this notion - I am sure that will just add to the things for them to discuss in therapy).
It's all part of accepting that we can't control other people. The only thing we can do is do our best to make sure that our kids get the best life possible, given the circumstances that are beyond our control. And yes, when I think about my kids living their lives with Mom and Dad not together (and don't even get me started on stepfamilies - I won't even go there, way too complicated), it breaks my heart. It really does. I think I just have not gone there too much because I am trying to focus on the positive.
Quote:
Its just so selfish. There's no going around that.
You are right. There is no way around it. But what can you do? My H freely acknowledges he is being selfish, but does that stop him? Nope. I guess there is something about his upbringing or his personality or whatever that allows him to be OK with that. Sigh.
me: 44 XH: 42 M 11 years D10 and S8 Bomb drop 9/27/13 D final 7/1/14
