Our Hs are working to the same script - timelines are similar, and family dinners have recently resumed (on his invitation) in the last month in my case too. And OW is still on the scene.
Resumption was short-lived however, as XH seemed to find it too hard to deal with, and cracked - BIG TIME.
So, setbacks and conflict are still the modal form of interaction for us, too.
Like you, I found MIL's apparent acceptance of OW at family gatherings to be like another betrayal.
But reading 25's post about what it's like from the family's perspective made me realise that they have little choice.
25's words really helped me come to terms with this aspect of the whole mess. I so hope it helps you too.
