I'm not afraid to take a stand.......

[TSquared2]

I'm sorry WR....

[Wonka]

Time for a group hug! (((Everybody including that tiny mouse snuggled up in your radiator)))

[Whiterose]

Thank you everyone........it's not good and I still have a week to go. I gratefully accept all your love and hugs:)

Thank you my friends

[LoisB]

I wish there was something to say to make it all better. I guess if I knew those magic words, we wouldn't be here.

It's hard and it's not fair and I hate it too.

I hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate it!!

I know you will be ok. You are smart, loving, kind, and fabulous. You will be ok.

Love to you,

Heather

[Whiterose]

Thank you heather.....yes, magic words. Those would be nice.

I've got S14's school photos now....do I message him to let him know or wait for him to message me and let him know at that point? I guessing he won't message me now until after the Jcc......

[job]

I think I would wait until I heard from him or when he comes to pick his stuff up mention it to him.

There's no need to get yourself upset all over again if he should respond in a nasty, disrespectful way.

[willbwell]

thinking of you!! hate it too!!
I would not message him..

[job]

WR,
Checking on you. How are you doing? How was your weekend?

[Portia]

WR

I am sorry you have to tackle this now. I hope it means that you get to start the new year fresh or at least fresher.

Whatever happens, by the weekend the biggest hurdle, the start of frank and true discussions at your judicial conference will be done.

You have received some really good general advice here but please make sure to discuss the details with your lawyer. Different jurisdictions have different laws, different countries more so. Keep in mind, too that just because your Hs lawyer is making arguments for your H, that doesn't mean that your lawyer believes them. Trust me, she has heard it all before. And that is your Hs lawyer's job - to fight for your Hs interests.

As long as you communicate clearly with your lawyer, you will be fine. If something is unacceptable to you, make sure you discuss that with her. For example, I do not believe for a second that your H is paying the visa in lieu of child support but if in fact he is, ask your lawyer to ensure that in future, the money is paid directly to you for the kids in case your jurisdiction allows for set-off of debts.

Finally, my friend, try to find some joy for the holidays. I finding it a little hard to scrape up some Christmas cheer myself, but may you find moments that are wonderful and truly yours.

[Whiterose]

Hi ladies.

Weekend was good. Kinda. Drove to a job Friday night, to do set up, and parked my van. Went to move it and there was no steering or brakes. Had to get it towed to the mechanic. Went back to work at 2am a friend picked me up. Saturday my dad met with the mechanic and it was my power steering. Needed to get replace and because it went the brakes seized so those had to get done too. My dad paid. It's like a $500 bill. I did some housework and my tenant worked on the lock of one of the doors as I think the inside spring is gone. He couldn't figure it out before he had to go to work and is home on the island right now but will take it to a lock smith for me at some point. Which I'm very grateful for.
Sunday morning the boys and I, and the dog, did some cute family photos. Some with a Christmas theme and I got them done up as a Christmas card. Will replace the photos with h with the new ones. I took off my wedding band in the photos but have since put it back on. Went and did our annual, with my sister and her family, cutting of the Christmas tree. We were there about an hour or so. I tagged us all in on twitter/fb and h messaged S19 to ask how it was going as we were leaving actually. S was surprised. Said 'oh look who's messaging me". I said he probably is becaause he saw were here. Asked what S19 was up to and S said I'm going to the Canucks game tonight. H said "again?" Pretty much their coversation. Came home and S14 and I got the tree into the stand. It's crooked so I'm going to have to get tentant to help me straighten it. It's decorated so we'll have to be careful. My mom's 63rd birthday today so we all got together last night for pizza and cake. At 4:30 h changed his fb profile pic to one of bill Murray pointing a finger saying "you su(k". I'm guessing that one is for me, although I'm blocked so really can't see it. His sisters and mom all "liked" it.

I'm getting more and more nervous about Friday. H cannot determine how my child support is spent. I do. She has asked for the statements of his visas to determine how much of it is family debt. I wonder if h is as nervous as me? I kiddo thinking what if the judge thinks h is right and I'm difficult and a b1tch and feels bad for h.? That I'm using my boys?

Thanks for the support ladies!!