Let me see if I get this right. When people tell me to let go, it's really not about letting go of my w but rather the resentment and anger that I feel for her because of the a I think she is having.
That I really should not be looking for answers to my questions because I already know the answers. The a happened because I was not full feeling my w needs because I did not know what they were. I was full feeling the needs I thought she needed. Because of that she fell out of love with me and someone came along that met her needs.
That we were not truly honest with ourselves or each other. I know that I could only deal with the honesty when it felt right to me, all the other times I lashed out with anger which probably caused the w to shut down on me.
The reason to detach is so my love for her doesn't rapidly run out while I have to wait for the a to run its course. I don't have to agree with how she is handling the situation, I just have to let her make her own mistakes and then let her deal with the consequences. During this period i need to change the things about myself that I don't like and become the man I need to be to become happy in life, with or without my w.
If we r, I should really not expect an apology because she may think I'm the one that should apologize for causing her pain all these years.
M 47 W 38 My S 21 Her S 17 Our S 8 M 8 DB 9/5/13
"You don't know how strong you are until strength Is all you have" Bob Marley
