ONE YEAR UPDATE TIME: I wish I was one of those success stories that happens quickly... but as most of us know.. the true MLCers don't cure themselves that fast.. Not must good to report in regards to my W.. she is still in replay.. still with her boy toy.... I hear from her every month or so.. we may text back and forth for an hour or two..all very light stuff.. no R talks.. then off she goes..... She is NOT the person I feel in love with anymore.. although I do still love her.. (the old her).
It has taken a full year to finally get to the point where I am 95% detached from her MLC. I still come here almost everyday to read. I have read and re-read a lot of different post on here for direction and inspiration.. I will say I encourage people to re-read old post that may have read and bookmarked months ago. I know the further detached I get and go back and read something it takes on a new meaning now that I have a better hold on myself and my emotions. I am not sure how much longer I am going to stand for my M. If I was getting more positive feedback I probably would stand longer... but since there has been none.. I don't see it lasting much longer. I am very grateful that I have stood this long because it really has given me a chance to work on myself.. I am starting to feel more whole and alive than I have in a very long time. Friends and family have all noticed my changes which is nice to get positive feedback. I will say I was only truly able to start working on myself once I decided to to go very dim about 6 months ago. it really was the key in taking the focus off of her and putting it on me. I will always love my W... and maybe one day God will bring us back together... or maybe not.. either way is ok. A year ago I thought my world was ending and my life was over, and now I see it really is just beginning.... Like others have said before .... no I wouldn't have choose this to happen... but in a lot of ways I am glad it has. I only hope that one day my W will be able to learn the lessons I have learnt from all of this
Bottom line is.. If you do the work on yourself and let go of your spouse.... Things do get soooo much better.
M-39 W-41 T-9yrs BD-Dec 2012 “regardless of your choices and the fact that they may have caused me to experience painful emotions, I still love you because I recognize the purpose of our journey.”
