And the beat goes on..!

[littleGTO]

Awwwww, LOVE to come here and FEEL ALL THE LOVE!!!!

Thanks, PS...you are soooo very sweet! You are amazing too & I know some lucky girl will come your way and you will have a new life of great memories to create ahead!!

AS- True detachment...hmmm....sometimes I wonder if I'll ever really get there. It seems that stbxh is really stressing me out every time we interact...he keeps pressing and pressing about the child custody situation. But, this is about my kids and I think that's where the emotions are stemming from mostly. Crying more recently when I think of how things will be changing-- it's scary for me to think of not having the boys as I do now. I know I will be okay when we've all had time to adjust, but I don't want to agree to the "wrong" things in the divorce concerning the boys.

It's hard to think about not having the boys as much as I do now. The sad thing is I do think they need to see him more. But, for me I feel like I am giving up being a full-time mommy then. BUt, recently I have not been doing as well when it comes to "being present" with them.--- two reasons-- the divorce and pianoman.

I feel selfish about having a new relationship...but it feels SO good to be with him and talk to him! It's just been so long and I have always known that I would not live my life without a partner...I'm not saying it will be pianoman--who knows! But, I am saying I think I am just meant to be part of a team/ of a loving, healthy relationship. And, pianoman is definitely filling a void I've had for a very long time.

I can't really say I am applying DBing any more with stbxh...our interactions are about as tense and heated as they've ever been. I get emotional thinking about sad it is that the boys parents will never be together again--their family is broken...and I will never know for sure how this will impact their lives and their relationships.

BTW- health concerns are still annoying me- lol! Getting some further tests...hope for the best, because I feel like if I can live through a broken heart I can live through anything!!!