Being the nice person isn't always fun!

[CallaghanClown]

2x4's at the ready......

I just had a huge brain fart and couldn't control myself. It all spilled out. I seriously didn't see it coming and couldn't keep it coming out.

I said:

I set boundaries and you piss all over them because you are disrespectful

I have to supervise your time with the kids because you have no control over what you say or do

You showed my kids to another woman on FaceTime

D6 said she wanted to kill herself

You lie to me and I don't want to hear you say you are being honest.

I'm not going to enable your bad behaviour any longer.

You didn't want to be part of this family anymore and I don't want to play happy families anymore but I have to for the sake of the kids.

When you disrespect me I don't want to be near you or hear from you but I have to because of the kids.

Stop promising to visit the kids and then let them down.

Don't say you'll call them and then don't.

Don't tell me you have no money when I know you are out spending it.

If you are going to continue cheating on me we should get a divorce.

He denied all cheating. Says he never goes out. That he's home or working all the time. That he appreciates everything I'm doing. That he tells everyone how amazing I am and not that I'm keeping the kids from him.

I told him I wouldn't change places with him for the world because he must be going through hell but that I sometimes need space because I don't want to be playing happy families with him. I'm grateful that we can be friendly to eachother and I'll make him welcome for the sake of my kids but I don't want him having the best of both worlds!

We both cried and we ended up hugging.......hugging.....it's the first time he's initiated touch since BD.

I wish I'd kept my mouth shut, but I feel like I've cleared my air. I didn't shout at all and I kept my cool. I hope I haven't caused any harm to my journey.

I guess I better get back to some serious DB after all that.