I agree with Melissa that it is going to be a fine line on being confident/taking charge and appearing like you are trying to control your W. When I read your description of the events last night, it almost seemed like you treated your W like your D. You gave them both tasks to complete. But again, I dont know what goes on in your house. My recommendation would be that you take charge with respect to yourself and your D. I would be nice to your W and even chat with her so she does not feel excluded, but dont assign her tasks (getting drinks/folding the laundry). If you really need help, then I would ask nicely. I feel like most WAS do not like being controlled at all. I think that you did a great job with your D. My guess is that if you and your D are getting stuff ready, your W will volunteer to help.
