W sent me a sad skype. She's very sad, stressed at work, can't sleep.
Scary that she said sometimes she wished she would just die and that she sometimes feels like she's going to have a heart attack (from the work stress). She's very healthy and always has been. Just recently had a physical. Pretty sure it's just panic attacks. I told her how it can feel like that.
She had made a similar comment about the state of the world when I was joking about Skynet (from the Terminator movies) because of something I read in a tech article. She basically said the sooner we all die the better.
I told her how much I understand, and how many times I felt the same way over the years from work stress (had my heart checked twice - just fine!) and how I sometimes wish we'd have just skipped college (and all the debt we accrued from it) and just had jobs we could leave behind at the end of the day. I said I often dream of just dumping the job and the debt and running away (hey, you never know....). I wish she could jest quit her crappy job, but in 15+ years since college, her student loan has been deferred so many times I think it's actually grown.
I did tell her that her symptoms are depression, for sure and that lots of people, and two kitties, love her. I don't think she's actually suicidal at all - based on how she acts when we're together.
Last night she seemed a bit down, but we did have fun watching Catching Fire again. She already planned to come by tomorrow to have dinner before her hair appointment (which she moved back over to this neighborhood). She asked is I wanted to get the Christmas tree out and decorate it (Humbug! Thought I was going to escape that chore this year.)
