If there were any special events, I had to make it happen by planning and carrying through. He would be there to enjoy it, but it would have been really nice if he had surprised me with a weekend trip......or just going to the movies. Some women don't want to take control, but feel they have to, b/c the H won't take charge. I wasn't looking for a boss or a parent, I wanted a leader for my family. I believe in partnership in a M, but I also believe the man should be the primary protector and leader.

A woman has to respect her H as a man before she can feel sexual attraction to him. If he will let her show disrespect for him by the way she speaks and her attitude toward him (especially in front of their kids and other people), then she will begin to feel contempt and she will get mean. She keeps pushing his boundaries b/c she keeps hoping he will find the guts to stand up to her. I don't even know that every woman is aware she is "testing" her H at that time, but I believe every woman's behavior will ultimately get worse toward a H who becomes a door mat. Being passive does not keep the peace in a MR. It destroys passion and eventually it will destroy her love for him b/c she has no respect for him.

So, crying, begging, pleading, etc., from a LBH only makes the disrespect from a WAW worse. That is why many seem cold as ice.

I find it very sad to read where several men say they are afraid to stand up to the W. If a man cowers in the face of his W, he need not expect her to admire & desire him.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!