new life part 2

[Not Quitting]

K, I'd say go with your gut on this. If you don't feel that it is something that absolutely needs an answer, then don't answer.

You sound like you're now in a good place and you are getting to know that you will survive without your H. You are proving to yourself most importantly, as well as to others, that despite struggling you can do this on your own. I'm the same - my bills are paid on time (usually as soon as I get the bill), I have a budget in place which is working really well and I've actually managed to put money into a savings account, which is something that H and I jointly haven't done in years.

I'm glad that your in-laws haven't abandoned you - I know you don't have your own family nearby - so this will really help you.

You're sounding good . Keep it up.

[kelela]

Thank you NQ im starting to feel the same way too; I also do the samething too I pay my bills as soon as I get them so that way if I did have a little extra after paying my bills I put that extra into my savings. I actually made plans to go out this weekend with one of my co works not sure what we will do but I'm finally ready to move on and get a life now. I want to think you NQ for always being here for me. I'll keep you posted.

[Not Quitting]

K, here's an idea that I started using, which is how I've managed to build up my savings. Every payday, I look at what the balance was in my chequing account before my pay went in and round it to the nearest $5, then transfer that amount into my savings. If I have to move some back into my chequing account before the next payday that's fine, but most times I've been able to leave at least some of it in the savings where it's earning a little bit of interest. And my debit card is set up so that I can't access the savings account other than to deposit at an ATM so I can't spend the money in there without transferring it to the chequing account first.

Enjoy the weekend, whatever you end up doing. I'm glad I've been able to help you .

[kelela]

NQ this is so funny that is excectly what I'm doing I transfer the loose change into my savings account and keep my checking account in dollers form. It names it so much easier to calculate my balance.

[Not Quitting]

That is funny. I also empty the loose change from my purse at the end of every day (I only carry bills and loonies/toonies in my wallet) and put it into a pot. Once I've got enough to roll I do that and either use it to pay my son his allowance or deposit into the savings account.

[kelela]

Its just to funny that we are doing the same thing. I just wan to make sure that I will have extra money just in case and I'm starting ahead for next Christmas so that I will be able to get presents for my boys and hopefully in about 9 years from now after my boys graduate from high school I will have enough money to move back to my hometown. I'm so ready to move back home. And once I do that I will never ever leave my hometown ever again.

[Not Quitting]

My goal is a shorter time frame. I'm currently living in my dad's house. My goal is for me and my son to be in our own place within the next 12-18 months - whether my h is still in the picture or not is up to him.

My son already knows what he wants to study at college and I've started a college fund for him with a regular monthly contribution going into it. That's another thing that h wasn't in favour of - he always said that we had to pay for our own education, so should S13.

[MileHigh]

K, I moved away for someone else - twice! If I ever have to find someone else, I'm going to make sure she's from my home town. Or at least home state.

[kelela]

NQ I wish that I could move back home now but when I had spoken to the lawyer back in July he told me that if both spouses don't agree on if I can take the boys out of the state that they were born in I'm not allowed to move out of state.so pretty much I know H will never allow me to take the boys out of state. So I'm pretty much stuck here until they are of age. So this is the reason why I will be here for The next 9 years. And as right now only my oldest and I know that we are planning to leave Ohio in 9 yes. My oldest and I had not even told H of our plans. This is between myself and my oldest. And plus I will need at lease that long to have a pretty good savings for us to have.

[kelela]

I know what you mean. But for me I think that this will be my only one time marriage I know that I can not go through this heart break again; this situation of my marriage had broken my trust and believe in love. The only love I have now are for my boys. I know that I will be much better off on being on my own. Even through I'm still struggling with finance right now but my main bills are all up to date. I think that as of right now I wouldn't care if or if not H comes back at all its about time I move on with my life its been a rough four months and I'm ready to move forward. I know i still have a loooooong way to go but this is my first step on moving on and time for me to let go now.