on the edge pt 2

[dingo]

Well guys - I think I am giving up the fight and pushing ahead with the D. After helping her and a couple of her friends move her furniture out of her house and listening to her tell me: "don't worry, I'm only moving the stuff I absolutely need in case I decide to come back" and "I am committed to giving us a chance and promise to stay away from the OM" all night, I found out that she spent the night at his place.

I spoke with her about it this morning and told her that she obviously had lied to me about her intentions regarding the separation and by saying the things she had said the previous night. She told me that she did really want to try to see if the separation could help our marriage but also wanted to explore the other relationship. Also that her feelings were stronger for him right now so she decided she couldnt do no contact. I told her that was not what we had agreed to regarding the separation and that she needed to process the papers she was served.

This may seem reactive and impulsive but I will not be plan B and don't want to put myself through a separation where I abide by the agreement and she doesn't. I feel like I have been manipulated and stepped on. She has zero respect for me and probably very little respect for herself.