ONE DOWN ONE TO GO

[job]

Ambivalent,
I'm going to tell you exactly what I see going on here and I'm not going to sugar coat what I'm thinking and it's probably going to upset you so, please keep in mind, I've been around a very long time and have seen quite a few things in my day on this forum and others that I am a member of. Okay?

1. He moved out and moved approximately 2 hours away.
2. Most of his communications are by text. Correct?
3. Comes over w/a hunting buddy and you discover receipts and Viagra in his vehicle.
4. He continues to complain about expenses and speaks of you getting a job.
5. Advises you to get a checking account in your name (only).
6. Continues to complain about expenses and your lack of employment.

What I am seeing here is a man who is calmly cutting the ties w/you one step at a time. He is trying to gently get you to a place where he can just walk away and not feel quite as guilty about it. I have to give him credit, he's being very sly w/his actions and quite frankly, I hope that I am wrong, but I don't think so.

The pressure is on to get you situated w/employment so that he doesn't have to fork over his money to pay your living expenses. That's why there is so much pressure on right now. It's not about what he's spending on himself, but on what he's spending on you and the family. He's entering the very selfish mode and doesn't want to share his money w/you and the sooner you get a permanent job and making money, the sooner he will start advising you to pay certain bills, etc.

Ambivalent, I know you don't want to believe what I'm saying, but you need to get your head out of the sand and start thinking about how to protect yourself financially. It's time to think about seeking out some legal advice on your situation. I've sat here and read each and every posting that you have made and I see the pattern and yes, my thoughts on where he's at in his crisis are right on the target...he's still in the early stages of replay and I can tell you, it's going to get worse before it gets better. You need to listen to what I'm telling you...need to see a lawyer or go on the internet and see what the state laws are for separation/divorce are and learn about your benefits. You do realize because he's established his living arrangements in Maryland he could fiel for divorce in my state?

Ambivalent, it's time to start educating your self on separation/divorce laws. Even if it doesn't come to this, you still need to know what your rights are. I'm sorry if I have upset you, but honestly, it's time to start focusing on your financial situation and what could happen if he goes into full blown replay and you are left w/little or no funds each month.