Afraid I have waited too long

[nit84]

Ok so I am sitting here thinking of ways to do certain things all of which probably wont help my cause but I have some time so I will take a shot and see what responses I receive.


1. No proof of an A but cant help but think there might be an OM in the picture or lined up to be there. My reasoning for feeling this way is my W reluctance to work on the M.

a. Do I bring up R talk? I have yet to do so. Both times W has brought it up.

b. Do I completely back off and risk her feeling like I have moved on and maybe pushing her into the arms of OM if there is one by acting this way.

c. Do I tell her I plan on moving back home but into a separate bedroom because after all it is half my house and I have been paying more than my fair share since S to help W out because she lost her job two weeks after S.

I am trying to be a good DB er and for the most part I can follow Sandis rules but sometimes the rollercoaster ride becomes very frustrating and I dont how to handle it. I realize patients is a necessary part of this but it is very hard sometimes not feel like I am being taken advantage of by my W for how I am allowing her to live pretty comfortably and not upsetting the apple cart because I truly do want things to work out. I feel good at some points when I stand up for myself.

Only problem with standing up for myself is that it make the W upset because it makes her feel like I am trying to take some of the power back and it makes her uncomfortable.

I am surviving living at my parents house but it frustrates me to think imho that my W is at the Marital home playing a real life game of house.

I know that she isnt thinking logically and is being guided by her emotions but there has to be something that will snap her out of this fantasy she is in. Right?


She says she sees changes in me which I like because I have worked hard since the S at becoming a better person for myself with the hopes of becoming a man that a woman couldnt live without. W told me last R talk that I am a good person and would make somebody very happy and hopes I find it because I deserve it. It just cant be her at this point but maybe in future. Cant figure it out.