Afraid I have waited too long

[nit84]

Feeling like a doormat but not ready for LRT yet.

I voluntarily moved out when we S with understanding at least on my part, that after our ailing dog passed away I wanted to move back home either with my W or if she couldnt handle that. She could go elsewhere considering she is the WAS. At this point it has been 9 weeks since the dog passed. When she brought up a R talk about 6 weeks ago it was not the greatest talk we ever had but she opened up a little bit to me. After that talk I mention about moving back and she proceeded to get real angry thinking I was forcing her out. I assured her she was welcomed to stay but if she had to move out because it bothered her I would not try and beg her to stay.

She said she needed time a couple of weeks to prepare some draft agreement for me to look at. After two weeks I didnt say anything and when we talked she mentioned that because of a certain event it was going to delay her drafting up the paperwork.

She said maybe I could give her my list of what I wanted in a proposed settlement or D. I told her she wanted this so she should do all work and if I agree with what she has on her list than everything else would be mine.

This is no easy task I understand there is a lot of things to consider. My problem is that she seems to be dragging her feet for whatever reason and not following through on things I thought we agreed upon ie a"couple of weeks" time frame.


I dont want to force the issue but I would like to know if she is having second thoughts or what. Our last couple interactions werent the greatest I told her I want to come to house to get mail and she asked how long I would be there I said maybe an hour or two. She said that upset her because she wanted to come home at that same time. I told her feel free to do that I would be in another part of house and would try and stay out of her way as much as possible. She didnt go for that and said I just dont feel like dealing with you today. I have no problem with being around her and not discussing the M. In fact I have been over there several times and done just that. Her issue is if I keep coming over the house one day I am not going to leave and just stay.

I wouldnt do that but I think a couple of days up to a week would be enough notice. She would still be welcomed back to get her stuff a little at a time if she chose to leave.

My issue is how do I bring the subject up in such a way that it not aggressive and might lead to us to talking about maybe trying to work on things. That is my goal but I dont want to pressure her. If she goes she goes. I just dont want it to come off as an ultimatium. I would like her to see it as a dose of reality though. That this is really happening and if we dont begin to work on things it probably will start to get a lot tougher and moving toward her goal of D Obviously I will not be filing for D but if she does choose leave she probably wont as comfortable as she now because I feel like I have been more than accomadating to her over these last six months in regards to the house and giving her her needed space and such.