I believe that I am suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome and that makes recovery a little bit more difficult than I had previously anticipated. I'm sure I will also have this problem! In the first stages we are so geared into making changes, monitering the reasults, detaching and hoping our S's come home. That when they do come home we start a new stage; reality sets in and what we worked on so hard starts to change on working with our S's to keep the R on the right track. We also then seem to go back and have to deal with all we've been through. Think of it as the 6th stage of MLC; we have to go back through everything, closing the doors one by one.
I know that this post must sound selfish and petty to those who are still working so hard to pull their R back together again. But I've found that there are others here who have reached the same level of DB success as I, yet they too suffer with simular after-effects. So I take comfort in knowing that I'm not alone and/or just plain looney. "looney"? You? NO WAY! What we go through is very traumatic! We actually deserve more than a thank you or a pat on the back! Oh well, there are a lot of people in my surrounding area that think I'm nuts for "waiting"! Why do people think we are "nuts" because we are not doing what they think is right!?
There is "piecing the marriage back together" and then there is "piecing oneself back together". I'll agree 100% with this! I think you even have it in the right order! Because when they are home there is a whole set of new things we have to deal with. Since I can't talk from experience, but I do see from others here, just how hard it is!!
I've got to clear a new path for myself with little more than a pocket knife, so ... it's going to take some time and patience. I love this! Did you ever think of being a writer!? Could be worse; you may have a butter knife instead!
And it is healing for me to hear that my story is helping others. You are a great help and your attitude is wonderful!
Hang in there and stay positive. Because, as you can see, many wonderful changes can and do happen. Thank you!
