Afraid I have waited too long

[nit84]

Kdog,
I ran into W Thanksgiving Morning at the local donut shop. I was already in my vehicle drinking coffee when she pulled in right next to me. Couldnt tell her reaction but when she got out of the car she did give a wave then went inside. When she came out I tried to be positive and asked her if she was going to be able to come over for dinner she said probably not because she didnt think she would have enough time. I wished her and to tell her family I said Happy Thanksgiving. When I got back to my Parents home I found out that W had texted mom, about 30 mins before I saw her, to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving. I guess I should be ok with the fact that she still contacts my family but it makes me think way too much about why she does.



SM34,
I guess there is always that chance of an A but enough people know our sitch and are both our friends that I think it would have come out by now.

When we had a R talk about a month ago. I did say to her that people told me that she is acting like someone who has somebody already or has somebody in mind to fill the void. She said if she did they would already be moved in and paying the bills.


The house improvement is a bit of an issue because you may be right that it isnt that at all. It could be a reason of her getting so upset for me waiting so long to start a family.

The thing is I would try to work on the house but would get frustrated easily because I am not handy. My W knew this so when I attempted to do something I would get told by her to call my Father or Brother in law because I didnt know what I was doing. Im not very handy but I am not helpless either.

Then when I would try and do something like clean or dust or vaccuum to help out the W. I was told not to do that she would get it. I said it was no problem but she would get angry cause it was "her" work and she thought I was doing it to show her up. I would say fine you do it and walked away instead of fighting about it. problem is she wouldnt do it then either. Vicious cycle that when and if we reconcile I refuse to let bother me. I will just do it because it needs done and if I need help with repairs I will call someone to help instead of giving up so easily.


I would always try and keep the peace instead of arguing about things like chores because it seemed like an unproductive fight. Unfortunately it caused some resentment that would then come out in a totally unrelated argument that caused hurt feelings on both our parts.

I think the W knows that if it came down to her getting pregnant and us having a family that it would all get done somehow because it had to.

We both always knew that we wanted children. She is just upset I didnt tell her three years ago when I truly felt I was ready to have children. She was ready ten years ago. I dont blame her for being mad but if I could have said something back then instead of just 7 months ago I think she would have been ok with it. I will regret that decision for the rest of my life if we dont end up having a family together.