Just found this site while searching for some experience with wives having affairs.
Quick version: Got blindsided at the end of September. W wants separation. May reconcile but only with separation. A week later my company went bankrupt. Now unemployed.
My side: I've been having depression problems related to stress for the past 5 years. Been sober in AA 19 years. Love my kids and wife dearly. Been short tempered and not much fun during this time. Missed family trips-put work first. Put my financial insecurities first and did not listen to my wife's dreams about her life etc...Her heart hardened and I was in denial. I take full responsibility in cleaning up my side- counseling now, more time with kids, trying to change my attitude and lots of soul searching.
What she's done: She started drinking after 16 clean years 2 years back. Never said she was unhappy with marriage. After a while she started going to hear mutual friends band at clubs. Then coming in very late 2-3 times a week. I was home with our kids. Said she was out with friends. 2 months ago I got proof from reading her logged in FB that she's having sex with a guy I know. Both deny it. She says she's doing nothing wrong and won't stop. All our old mutual friends are very sad she's living this way especially because of the children.
