Can see sun with head out of sand - 2.5yr

[2thepoint]

Hey AD. Saw your post and thought I'd pop in to say hello and offer a comment or two.

Then another example, I was mentioning her grandson my nephew, who recently told me he's in love and he and his girlfriend plan to marry as soon as they can get a wedding organized. MIL said I met her and I said "oh, you MET her?" and got a lecture about not listening. She said "Let me start over. I MET her." oh boy. MIL said, I met her and thought she was immature. She kept laughing, and I thought that was immature. I could tell it was out of nervousness, but I didn't like it. So when she laughed about something that didn't seem like an appropriate time to laugh I asked her WAS THAT FUNNY?" oh boy, poor girl.

Just makes me realize more how damaging it must have been to grow up with that. She says these things in her cute little sweet Asian grandma way and under the nice tone of voice, there is such judgment and spite.

After all that you have shared, this ^^^^ explains so much about your H and his behavior, past and present. It is really quite remarkable and sad frankly, just how people can be so dramatically influenced by negative behavior of their parents. Good for you for working so hard to show your kids a different way forward.

H offered to pick up coffee for people so I asked for my usual tall soy misto, extra hot. H said "They hate it when you ask for extra hot. That's annoying." I didn't answer that, it was fine, whatever. I just really don't think the Starbucks people hate that, and when I'm paying for my expensive coffee there they usually seem fine with making it how I want it.

I'm with you here. If we're going to pay $4+ for a cup of coffee, it should be prepared to our liking. I'll take a grande vanilla latte, no foam and extra hot, please!