Back....again.

[TrentC]

Ya. So far nothing. I told him that he won husband of the year yesterday as a joke for leaving me lunch on my seat in my vehicle.

Why would you tell him that? You say it was a joke, so you didn't really think he's husband of the year? He's making you miserable for months, and one small act of kindness makes up for that?

Some people get so wrapped up in trying to figure out what to say or do to get what they want out of their spouses that they forget what it's like to be honest with them. Because honesty is scary; you are opening yourself up to someone you love, and if they react badly then it's easy to accept that as a criticism or rejection of yourself.

So start small. The next time he does something like that, don't go overboard or try to butter him up. Try simply saying "I really appreciated you doing that for me. Thanks." It's doesn't overstate anything and it's genuine.

He goes...I'm hardly husband of the year. I didn't respond. Didn't know what to say. The aura at home is awkward.

Because you will not stop trying to fix things; you can't help picking at the problem.

I was the same way early on; if I could just find the right thing to say or do, then she would realize what a big mistake she was making and things would be better.

But real life doesn't work that way. He might actually have to make that big mistake—and maybe other mistakes as well—before he recognizes the truth.