Julie, it's OK to cry - then go have a fun Thanksgiving with your S! I know, fun is relative, but do the best you can. And make sure you don't do any mind reading today. Don't think about where H is, what he is doing, or what he is thinking. Remember that you have no idea what he is thinking, so don't torture yourself.
I agree that if H feels that he has been released from the M "trap," he will feel less pressure to fight with you. However, he may still be angry with you and pick fights since he needs to blame you for his A. You just need to remain calm no matter what. And don't think about how long this is going to take - that can be overwhelming. Accept that there is no quick fix, and then live one day at a time. Do your best each day to be calm with H, work on yourself, GAL, and have fun with your son. You will see tiny improvements in how you feel.
me: 44 XH: 42 M 11 years D10 and S8 Bomb drop 9/27/13 D final 7/1/14
And make sure you don't do any mind reading today. Don't think about where H is, what he is doing, or what he is thinking. Remember that you have no idea what he is thinking, so don't torture yourself.
