Lou, I am sorry you are having such a tough day. I totally get the not being detached feeling - and it's only natural at this point for you to be affected by everything H says/does. Just make sure that you calm those thoughts by looking back to your DB plan and following it. Also, listen to your coach!
I'm going to let the vets address your question about how to handle your R talk. For me, all of our R talks have been about how we feel, what we've been thinking about, what went wrong, etc. Nothing about what is going to happen in terms of our M - we don't know right now.
As far as the Christmas Market . . . I think it is perfectly reasonable for you to say you would prefer not to talk during that event. And as for whether you should go at all, that's really up to you. Do you still want to go? Do you still want to meet up with H? If he is going to be there with OW, do you actually want to see him?
I hope some vets have time to weigh in today. Hang in there and remember to keep doing things for you!
me: 44 XH: 42 M 11 years D10 and S8 Bomb drop 9/27/13 D final 7/1/14
