The Road Not Taken

[tigerlily78]

JFun... I think she got more upset about you taking control of the financial situation because that is already a hot button issue that a lot of couples have issues with, and she may specifically have longstanding issues with money that make her feel vulnerable.

Also, let's face it... the person who is cooking and cleaning and putting the kids to bed is taking RESPONSIBILITY, not necessarily what most of us would consider "control." So there may be other issues in her mind connected to paying the bills, like you are forcing her out of the financial decisions, if you separated or divorced your taking full control of the bills may make it seem like you would be less effected by a split, etc.

My H also seems to have serious issues with a mindset of money = power and control, it may just be a common thread of their MLC paranoia... that they can't trust the WAS with control of the money in those ways. It's almost like they project their own untrustworthiness on to us as a coping mechanism.