Tad, you are seing what you want to see here. It is not the case that 'most' MLCers stay home, some do, some of the time. A few stay all of the time. Others, like your x and mine run hard and fast.
Is URworthy with her spouse, no, nor Lois, nor Golfmom nor Job. Just for starters.
Those who stay around are often hurtful and disrespectful of their spouses, openly texting or skyping with OP. Making mean remarks about the spouse, which is demoralising to put it mildly.
Look at Punkin - didn't see her spouse for dust . . . . It is how the MLC takes them.
Something else I've noticed from postings on this board. Most MLCers seem to have stayed home or were undecided or swing back and forth.
Mine didn't do that a t all.
She was like: I'm done. That's it. See ya.
tad
Tad -
Mine said "see ya" and was "done" but didn't leave, but now I wish he would have. He is driving me crazy. Would you really want her around you in her current state of mind?
You are far better off not being with the crazy. Maybe see that as a blessing in disguise.
WH
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
I think many people believe in the contract with God. If I behave this way or do that I'll receive some benefit. Unfortunately it doesn't work that way.
Also, Some of the richest people I know are the poorest in terms of materialistic things. I'm a firm believer that richness is inside ourselves you just need to find it.
Tad, I am 4 yrs removed from BD and divorced. My EXW never looked back once. Am I better that she is gone? absolutely. Do I have days where I think about what could have been? Absolutely.
Give yourself a break. This is difficult stuff. Making the best of this is a lifelong journey.
Beatrice, it is nice to hear from you. Haven't seen any posts from you (atleast on my thread) in a while.
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It is not the case that 'most' MLCers stay home, some do, some of the time. A few stay all of the time. Others, like your x and mine run hard and fast.
True. I just read so many threads here and some of the people still have contact or some type of communication. I just feel like I was never even given a chance or hope. Mine left, started "dating" the OM that she had been talking to, got engaged and is now married. Do I wish mine would have stayed in the home? Not sure, but it would have been nice to have a chance to atleast work on things. I told her from the beginning that there was no way we could work on things with OM in the picture. She was addicted to him and wouldn't quit talking to him. She couldn't quit talking to him. She was/is a mess. I guess what I am saying is there was no see-sawing back and forth with her. She just jumped the gun and boom that was it. Will it come back to bite her someday? I think it will, but maybe it won't.
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Would you really want her around you in her current state of mind?
Probably not. She is a looney-tune.
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I'm a firm believer that richness is inside ourselves you just need to find it.
I believe this too Mirage. Thank you for posting. As I said in an earlier post, I truly believe that she has lost so much more than me, she just may not realize it yet.
News:
I got a job and I start it on Monday. It is not what I wanted, but it is something. I am now a cab driver. Ug......
Like I said, it isn't what I wanted, but hopefully it will pay enough to get me by until I can find something else.
Three years ago:
Nationally recognized and award winning disc jockey.
Today:
Cabbie
Boy have things changed.....
Tad
Currently: M 56 XW 57 Sons 38,33,31,29
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13
Tad, I'm glad you have found a job. Being a cabbie will help to keep you focused on what you need to do...drive! You've had a lot of turmoil and disruption in your life over the last three years. The tide is turning and just like the phoenix, you will rise from the ashes once again.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family. It doesn't matter about the thrills and whiz bangs...it's having your family there, with you, for the day.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thank you Job. I had a nice Thanksgiving. Spent it with my mom and my boys. I hope you and everyone here had a nice one as well.
Now.......I need a little advice.
All of my boys received a text this morning from XW telling them that XW's stepdad passed away. He was basically her father.
Question is:
Do I send her a text telling her that I'm sorry? Even if she didn't let me know about it?
Tad
Currently: M 56 XW 57 Sons 38,33,31,29
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13
You're right. I will not be sending it. I thought about sending it to show a little compassion and to be nice, but.....not going to do it.
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Would you send it to someone you didnt know?
Nope and honestly I no longer know her.
Tad
Currently: M 56 XW 57 Sons 38,33,31,29
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13
Why are you still asking? Asking implies, IMO, that you are "afraid" of the outcome....almost like you do not want to "screw up".
Tad,
Dude I can only imagine how much pain you are still in. The fact that you still give a rats as* about how she might feel if you respond....tells me...that you are, in many ways still "standing", and that is totally okay. Fu*k I applaud you for it.
Are you standing still though? Are you stuck ...waiting for her to throw you a bone?
Let me ask you a question.....Would you want to date yourself right now?
Tad - There is no easy path bro..none. If I could only get you to see...that once you really stop staring at her you can really begin to address the chit in YOU.
From your post, it seems like the world is against you, like ya just can't catch a break. This has to feel horrible..but Tad, you are strong - remember that. Everything that you need is really inside of you - IMO, just covered by hurt. Don't give up Tad....do not give up on YOU.
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans