One giant leap forward! - Part 9

[T1000]

I'm having a lot of contrasting emotions lately.

I'm fine until I pick up or drop off the kids.
Friday I picked them up and W was in my head for an hour or so afterwards.

On Sunday when I dropped the kids off I took a load of her xmas decorations that I had in the garage. As I walked the kids up to the front door I just noticed OM2 sat in the living room.
I said goodbye to the kids and went to get the xmas stuff from the car. It was about 4 trips and I had to walkj past the window every time. I did my best not to look. I don't want to see if i can help it. I did see him interacting with one of the boys...I wanted to destroy him!
I kept my cool, put the last box down and said that was it. W said an enthusiastic "bye" and I said "See ya" very unenthusiasticly.

I find myself getting annoyed by the situation. One minute I'm thinking about it all then I stop myself and rationilize it. My W isn't capable of being a decent partner right now...maybe never. I should appreciate the time I do have with my kids and the time I get to myself because I'm not doing a hoop routine for W.
When I go through that process I do actually smile at the end of it.

At the end of August I remember when OM2 reared his grotesque head that it's normally 2 months between W sabotageing a firery hoop and semi crawling back.
As usual I thought it will be interesting to note but I believed 100% there was no chance.
Well 2 months later she put her knee pads on for a week or so and started the long crawl. It didn't last long. I also think as I always do there is no chance she will don the pads again.

Well 2 months time is end of December - New Year. New Year normally has her in a life changing spin so I will be vigilent with knee pad detector and hoop blocking device at the ready.