I don't have any advice, I just wanted to empathize that I know what you are going through. My H also feels the need to keep a foot on home base while spending his nights elsewhere... it is easy to feel taken advantage of in trying to walk the walk of "the wife he would want to come home to."
I packed my H's clothes up for him on Friday and even put them in the car. For some reason he didn't think that was helpful... just goes to show they can be screaming for freedom, but they don't REALLY want it most of the time.
me-35 WAS-37 T-16 1/2 Son-14 (HF Aspergers) BD,ILYBINILWY,"I met my soulmate": Oct5,2013 "Letting go because I love him, holding on because I love him."