Make a list of pros and cons of selling the house, including the financial pros and cons:
Selling the house now:
Pros - selling the house gives you cash to work with, settles things, you are free to downsize, W has to share in the expense of selling
Cons - will not go for top dollar if you cannot agree on spending money to fix it up, may take a long time to sell, dragging out the divorce
Buying W out of house:
Pros - it would be done quicker, you could take your time and fix up the house, then sell it later for top dollar
Cons - usually in a divorce, when the house equity is split, the subsequent cost of selling is not figured in. So, for example, if you have a $100,000 home with $50,000 in equity, normally you would pay your wife $25,000 to buy her out of her share. However, if you SOLD the house today, you would not net $50,000, but instead would have to pay realtors fees, closing costs, and pay to fix items identified by the seller on inspection - say, maybe, a cost of $9-10,000 when all is said and done. So you would only get $40,000 out of it - $20,000 to each of you. So - in this example, if you wanted to buy her out, fix up the house yourself, and sell it later for more money - you would need to be able to sell it for $105,000 PLUS whatever you spent fixing it up, just to break even with the amount you would have gotten if you had sold it right away and split it. On the other hand, if you could put $10,000 into it and make it so it could sell for $140,000 - you would net $140,000-$25,000 to wife -$10,000 in selling costs - $10,000 in fix it up costs - $50,000 mortgage payoff = $45,000 in your pocket instead of $20,000.
Could you get a room mate to help you with expenses while you fixed up the house? Can you refinance to get some of the money you need? Give us some numbers and an idea of how much sweat equity is available in this house (i.e., are nice well-fixed-up houses in your neighborhood selling for $10,000 more, or $50,000 more? How much money would it take to bring it up to that level? How much could you do yourself?)
